Alix_4.2_DQ14

Growing up, I never tended to "get embarrassed." I do however, sometimes, care what people think. But I still don't care to change myself or change my ideas because of what they think. I am just curious to what people think or know. I crave the knowledge of others but again, it does not matter to me what they think of me. If I find flaw in myself, then I correct that flaw. But I feel right, and I feel good about something, I am not going to change it just for the benefit of others personality-wise. This does not carry over, however, in everything else; just my personality. I am not going to change my core values or beliefs for someone else because I am who I am and no one will change that.

Melody_4.2_NI

"[A] personal order is never static, either, but is continually tested and modified through experience, access to new information, reinterpretation of the past, and discourse with other people."

"Never static." I like the use of that phrase to describe an individual's personal order. I definitely agree with that. For people to grow, they have be learning not only about the world and the people around them but most importantly about themselves, and in this process of learning, their beliefs, attitudes, and personality (or personal order) evolves. Just like the quote says, experiences, new information, reinterpretation of past events, and conversation with others continually shapes one's personal order and way of life. As individuals learn, they mature, and their values change. I can definitely see how this has been taking place in my life. My personal order has evolved and developed so much just since I have been in college. 

Do you guys know of people whose personal orders remain static? I can think of people whose personal orders wouldn't change possibly because they choose to just live according to the personal orders that their parents (or other authority figures) have set for them instead of discovering life and their identities on their own, but they still have their own unique life experiences that would cause their personal orders to evolve, wouldn't they? So their personal orders DON'T remain static?

Corey_4.2_DQ14

One example that happened to me today was in the middle of a performance for a small group of people. I was playing my guitar and singing when I made a mistake.... I played a D instead of an A in one of my songs. Now most probably didn't notice considering that everyone was talking and I was barely audible; however, I was so embarrassed that the generalized other would judge me. Why? I suppose it's this built in fear that if I don't appear perfect, then I mustn't be any good at all. I think this answers for most of why I get embarrassed when I mess up anything. We should be able to mess and and fail all day without any fear of judgement if we aren't worried about the generalized other.

Naima_4.2_DQ

I guess that some of the times when I have been concerned about what other people may think is when I have had to play piano at recitals. I get very nervous and excited at the same time. If I mess up, people would think that I am a terrible piano player, and that has always been a concern.
When I was 5 years old, I was supposed to recite a poem for an event at my kindergarten and I forgot the lines to the poem. I started to cry, but I will never forget that day because I was very embarrassed  I think this mattered to me because I had been practicing so hard to memorize the poem and I wanted to prove everybody that I knew the poem. I guess that I thought I had made a fool of myself. I was embarrassed because I was being watched by strangers and people who were older than me.
I guess in our daily lives we go through different situations that make us be aware of the people around us and make us behave a certain way to avoid being embarrassed.

Annabel_4.2_DQ

I think that all people care about what other people think regardless of any situation. I think people care so much because we care about our self-image. It can also be that if people have a certain image of you, then people feel that they are defined by what the other person thinks of you. And we feel that if you have a bad image of us, then people might not treat you the same way as if they have a good image. I think when it comes to self-image, we need to decide which images that other people have are important. For example, which is more important for you to stress about: a bad perception of you by your boss, or someone that you just kind of know? This is what I try to think of when people around me have a certain perception that I don’t like so I won’t care or put effort into caring what they think if they don’t matter in my life.

Christian_4.2_DQ

Honestly, I have found the "generalized other" kind of ridiculous on several occassions. I do believe that we should follow the social orders, but that should not keep us from being spontaneous. Sometimes we restrain ourselves from participating in new sports, or having friends that are different from us (race, age, etc.) because we are afraid that society might think less of us, even if we are not doing anything wrong. I try not to care about the generalized other anymore, for example if I do something or say something dumb when I'm out with my friends and start laughing really bad in let's say... the mall or a park or a restaurant... people might think I'm ridiculous, but being spontaneous is part of the joys of life. I don't consider myself part of that generalized other as I don't like getting involved in that which is none of my business, I would not judge someone for being spontaneous.

DJ_4.2_DQ

     I have had many experiences of embarrassment, but I find that I at least try to simply block those times from thought. However I do know that the way out of an embarrassing situation, is normally just laughing it off and having a good sense of humor. Remember that later on down the line most if not all of your most embarrassing moments will become some of your most wonderful memories.


   I believe we strive on a daily basis for "perfection" and yet we never can reach it. So the "other" whom from which we fear ridicule is in fact either all together non-existent, or is an individual that lies to themselves by believing that they are perfect and that the rest of the world should strive to be more like them.

Gabriella_4.2_DQ

So I went on a trip with some friends, and there they met a guy who was very good-looking. When I saw him the first thng I thought was, ''Wow his face is so symmetrical'' haha. Anyways, before you met people, especially if you have not talk to them, noverbal behavior is crucial because it can attract their attention.  I was walking in front of him, but I was wearing heels. The street was rough and it had a lot of little stones, and I tripped on my heel. Luckily, I did not fell down, but still I was concerned about what he thought because I was interested on him. You can never feel embarrassed if you do not care about what the other person thinks. And if you care is because you have an interest on the other person.

Alex_4.2_DQ14

I don't usually get to embarrassed with things but after the 2008 Olympics I really got into gymnastics. Many people think its just for the girls. But I was also very fascinated by the sport and how some people could train themselves to be that athletic at such a young age. I've always been a big fan of baseball, basketball, and football. Those were my main sports growing up but I've liked gymnastics for quite some time. If someone wants to make fun of me for then that's there problem. because if I had it to do over again I would have gotten into gymnastics a long time ago.

Madeleine_4_DQ14

Once when I was little, I got in a lot of trouble at school and a letter was sent home to my parents. I was so embarrassed by what I had done, that I forged their signature and did not tell them of my shame.

Everyone becomes embarrassed at some point in their life. Being embarrassed matters to us because we would like to put up the facade of us being impenetrable and flawless. This of course is impossible, because we are human and humans are not perfect. Yet, this thought is appealing and sought after by many. This is why it matters.

Dalton_4.2_DQ14

When I was young I remember one time where I got extremely embarrassed. I was walking across the playground when one of my friends threw a rock at me by accident. It clocked me in the back of the head and knocked me out, but when I came to, I was so embarrassed that I was knocked out that I immediately started crying and covered my face. The pain wasn't what made me cry, it was the thought that all of my friends saw me get hit in the head and fall. Sometimes people get embarrassed because of ridiculous situations. Ever since then I have been sure to love who I am and what I do at all times.

Cole_4.2_NI

A point was made on Page 92 that color and sound can exist only relative to the perciever, but I would like to dispute this, particularly the answer that people usually offer to the question "if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" Many people often state that sound cannot exist without someone to hear it, but this is not true. With the right frequency and volume, sound can shatter glass. No one has to be around to hear it, but if they returned later to find the glass destroyed, they clearly did not need to be around for sound to exist. The perception of people plays a huge part in shaping our reality, but there are some truths that are solidified by what we see around us and the social structure or opinions of others play no part in affecting these truths.

Madeleine_4_OL1

Many people jump to conclusions, the media, people you know, and even yourself. Evidence of this is everywhere. When Corey Haim suddenly died in 2010, nearly everyone said he overdosed on drugs like cocaine, heroine, etc. But, he really died from pneumonia. This jump to conclusions of the worst kind hurt his friends and family.

Corey_4.1_OL

I think one of the examples I would use of an event that changed with discussion is the recent China vs. Japan conflict over some islands. I can honestly say that I thought the whole standoff was dumb and pointless, and with conversation with my friends and some older folks, I have changed my stand and perspective on these events. I now can kind of understand why China is mad at Japan and why Japan is taking a stand. I understand the history and the depth behind the story. Someone made me put on someone else's shoes and give myself insight.

Annabel_4.1_OL

It’s really weird how news or gossip that we hear can be told one way but then digging in deep you find out that there is more to it or the first thing you heard was a lie. People will tell people what they personally think happened but it is the farthest thing from what really did happen. Or someone can tell you one detail and if you passed the message off to other people by the end of the day you would hear multiple different messages. Communication can be very tricky whether professionally or non-professionally done. I think its interesting how sending out a message can be so easy but receiving and passing on the same exact message can be hard.

Cole_4.1_OL

The topic of "marijuana legalization" has become a favorite topic between my friends and me. I am neutral on the issue at the moment because I was always brought up with the "knowledge" that it was bad, but research has disproven almost all of the myths installed in my youth. Additionally, I have several friends that use it and admit it is less dangerous or addictive than alcohol or tobacco. I know the signs of when someone is doped up; they are being truthful in this. Yet when I talk to parents and educators, most still consider the very notion of marijuana usage taboo. My perspective changes a little with each person I talk to because of the position they hold in life. My view will change the most once I truly dive into it with my own research, but so far, it has not become a key issue that requires me to take a stand, so like any good fine arts major, I am putting off the decision.

Dalton_4.1_OL

When it comes to getting news, people are never good about getting all of the facts to you at once. Even the media only releases a bit of information at a time as they get it. There have been many bad rumors that come out because of this. Only a bit of a story was told to me from person to person about a week ago until I heard the whole thing. I was told of a friend at a party. They told me all of the crazy things that he did. It wasn't until later that I found him and asked him about it. He told me that everything that I was told was true.

Christian_4.1_OL

Every time I go eat breakfast at the Cafeteria I see they have the News on: thus, I watch it, even though I don't pay much attention to it. I have been doing this all the year and I always thought to myself... well I don't really understand what's going on, but I am not really familiar with how American News shows are, so I'll just watch it. They were always showing some sort of celebrity scandal or sports controversy.

It just occurred to me today, as I was talking with some friends during lunch, that maybe it was not only my perception that the News show does not cover truly important issues. So I asked, and they said they didn't like that particular show, or news in general for that matter because they only covered shallow stories, and didn't focus on the important issues that are going on in the country.

Their comments opened my eyes, and my perception changed. I went from not caring, to believing that the News show was shallow and focused on covering celebrities and sports rather than political or any other sort of story.

DJ_4.1_OL

     This past Monday the power went out in several buildings across campus. As a result many people have been talking about this incident and trying to make sense of who all was affected. I was not affected by the power outage, instead I was not aware that anything had happened until my arrival in class that morning. As the day went on conversations between myself and friends, enlightened me to some previously unknown facts. In the end I still don't know everything that happened, but I have another than idea to understand the effect it had on the campus.

Gabriella_4.1_OL

A girl lost her scholarship and had to leave school due to a major problem, and everybody was scandalyzed about the event. Few people knew the truth about what was going on including me. I heard many people gossip in the halls with their friends about why she got expelled. Many rumours started arousing, and then it got to the point where I was not sure if I should laugh or get mad about what they were saying. One of the rumors was that she was pregnant. In order to clarify what happened, the authorities called the students to meeting. They explained the reasons why the girl had to leave the school. It was mainly a GPA issue and that she was hanging around the wrong people. Many interpretations were drawn by different people. They judged her actions based on dispositional factors and not situational ones. People describe events in their own perspective, and most of the time these judgments are wrong and biased. People at school add information that was not true and made up their own stories. Even though the authorities tried to clarify the situation by doing a meeting, they went sort of unethical with the management of the whole problem. At the end, people will always talk, so as long as we know what is the truth, we should feel serene and calm.

alex_4.1_ol

Many of the rumors i have heard were back in high school. People never went to the source of the rumor people just assumed things and never took the time to go to the source and fiend out what really happened. I knew a kid who was a freshmen last year at my high school and many of the other students said mean things about him. after i spent some time with him and got to knew him more he turned out to be pretty cool person. so it is not good to spread rumours when you don't have all the facts.

Alix_4.1_OL

Topics and views obviously vary from person to person. When discussing any topic among a group a friends those different opinions come to light and you definitely see how most people think and feel. I hate honestly dislike most media. Media tends to screw with the truth in a story in order just to make the topic more interesting or relevant. I believe in the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I try not to argue points about a certain topic with my friends but when I do, I make sure I am factual. If I represent a topic falsely, I own up to it and learn from my mistakes.

Melody_4.1_OL

One particular topic of conversation that I can think of in relation to this issue is one that I had with my sister concerning a really close friend of ours. Let's just call this friend "A." A is someone who is incredibly dear to me and my sister; however, especially since A entered into adolescence, we have seen how much trouble she has when it comes to relationships. She has trouble not only in her romantic relationships but also in her close friendships. She is very critical of other people yet sensitive to the way they treat her and react to her to the point that even my sister and I had some trouble just being close to her; she reads too much into people's actions towards her and then seems to take it out of proportion to the point that it causes a lot of problems.

In dealing with the problems in our respective friendships with A, my sister and I had our own thoughts and ideas regarding A and the problems that she had in relationships. However, upon discussing it together, our opinions and understanding about A's behavior began to change. We realized that it was not simply that A enjoyed being dramatic and was just not mature enough to know how to handle her relationships but that her behavior may be caused by some familial issues that she had while she was growing up. We began to recognize different events that happened to A while she was younger that is probably significantly affecting her behavior and ability to relate to and interact with people in her life right now. 

Discussing the issue together enabled me and my sister to interpret A's behavior differently as well become more understanding of A and the issues that she has.

Naima_4.1_OL

One of the topics that has been a subject of debate between my friends and I, is the selection of the new president for the University of the Ozarks. Some of my friends and professors have been the the presidential forums. I went to the second one.

Whenever the first candidate came, I wanted to know everything about him. Whenever I asked one of my professors about him, he said he loved him. But then I asked some of my friends, and they said that he was not what they expected, so my opninion about him changed; I wasn't so excited about that candidate.

Then I went to the second forum. I loved the candidate and I loved the way he answered my questions during the forum. After the forum, I asked one of my friends what she thought of this candidate, and she said that he addressed better the questions that he was asked, but that the first candidate was more family-oriented and more open. I'm not the one who's going to choose the new president, but I guess that discussion helps shape our attitudes toward different issues in life.

Tyler_4.1_OL

Some people jump to conclusions before they know all of the facts. For example, before this election year many Americans thought that Bill Clinton was against Obama. However once campaigning began many Americans were suprised to learn that that Bill Clinton is the top spokes person for Obama in this up coming election.   

alex_3.4_DQ13

I personally don’t watch House but I get the gist of the crater. And I that many people watch the shows like that because of the drama that is involved with the show.  Same with most of the shows on mtv are for the drama. For example Jerseys Shore. When someone watches a show like that they’re not usually looking for an action thriller it’s for the drama

Anne_3.3_DQ13

On the show House, Gregory House is a grouchy, insecure, arrogant, incentive person, but also a very gifted physician. The reason why people watch the show or why I believe people watch the show is only because people are too afraid to act like House does. Yes, House may be all those things, but when he acts like that he gets his job done, and has no regrets in acting that way towards his co-works or patients. House has his funny moments and are half the time very true in the situations that he gets into.

Becca_3_OL

List of Friends and Acquaintances

These are all my friends back home in Arkadelphia/Little Rock, I talk or text them daily. Our relationships are the ones that mean the most to me. I didn’t include any of the people that I have met here because I’m not in a place where those relationships are fully developed yet.

Mike Meeks (Larger, but not fat – 1X)

·         Best Friend

·         41 Years Old

·         Youth Minister at FUMC Arkadelphia

·         Husband with Two Children

·         ADD

·         Funny

·         Good Advice Giver

·         Father Figure

·         Christian

·         Helps keep me sane

Patrick Shownes (Larger, but not fat – 2X)

·         Best Friend

·         26 Years old

·         Tech Geek

·         Single

·         Hard Worker

·         Faithful to Friends

·         Good with Advice

·         Jokes a lot

·         Thinks in crazy ways

Shannon Michelli (Thin, losing weight from Pregnancy - M)

·         Best Friend

·         18 Years Old

·         Mother

·         Dating her Child’s Father

·         Happy

·         Energetic

·         Responsible

·         Doesn’t always think things through

·         Listens, but ultimately has a larger problem

·         Involved in Drama

·         No Proclaimed Faith

Anna Bell (Thin - M)

·         Best Friend

·         18 Years Old

·         Dating the same guy for 2 years

·         No proclaimed faith

·         Crazy

·         Listens

·         Talks a lot

·         Lies about past

·         Rough early home life

·         More focused on what others think about her

Becca_3.4_DQ13

I never really watched the show religiously because of all the gross graphics, but from what I know, House's personality is the whole reason why the show is so popular. Most audiences want characters that they can believe in. From the few episodes that I have watched it seems that he never learns, the plot is always the same.
I can't really comment on this because I haven't seen the show much.

Becca_3.3_DQ12

I believe that my past relationships do have a huge impact on the relationships that I make in college. As crazy as it sounds, I learned most of the relationship stuff from my friends dating experience. I think the things that I learned from them will help me know more of what not to do, then what to do.
I don't believe that I'm a prisoner of my past when it comes to my recollecting the memories of my past relationship. We still talk to each other, but it's never going to be the same because it wasn't meant to be. I hope that I don't have the same experiences in all my relationships, that would suck, but I can't really attest to this at this moment because I've only had one relationship.

Madeleine_3_DQ13

The book says that the character, Gregory House is a bad person. This is far from true. If he was such a terrible person, he would not make any attempt to help the people who walk into his hospital needing his help. Doctor House is such a lovable character, not because he is someone to relate to, but because even though he says he does not care, in the end he does care about whether or not his patient lives or dies. He says he does not like people, yet he loves Doctor Cuddy and he loves his best friend, Doctor Wilson. He may be cruel to them, but he does care about his team as well. There is a common saying, "You must be cruel to be kind."

In television shows, the brilliant characters always are damaged in some form. For Doctor House, it was multiple things: his injured leg, and his addiction to prescription pain killers.

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. 

- Oscar Levant

There is a point of brilliant intelligence and genius that is on the verge of madness and insanity.

Doctor House is a brilliant genius and his character is loved by millions. In The Big Bang Theory, it is quoted that "smart is the new sexy." I think that the "sexy" mainly meant admirable, and many people admire smart characters in TV shows other than House M.D. Shows like Doctor Who, Sherlock, and Big Bang Theory also have very smart characters similar to Doctor House. In Doctor Who, there is a villain named The Master who is often called one of the most brilliant creatures in the entire Universe, yet his brilliance led him to insanity. Even though he is evil, his brilliance is admired by many characters and fans and he remains one of the favorite characters in the show. The main character, The Doctor, also is an extremely brilliant Time Lord, (The Doctor and The Master are Time Lords from the planet, Gallifrey), yet he suffers from the lack of companionship. He seeks out companions, mostly Earthlings, to join him on his adventures through time and space, but, in the end, he unintentionally ruins their life by their death on an adventure, or their lack of being able to handle a normal life after it is their time to go home. In the television show, based of the book, Sherlock, main character, Sherlock Holmes is very similar to Doctor House when he says he does not like people, yet he loves his caretaker, Mrs. Hudson and he loves his best friend, John Watson. Sherlock's character is often labeled as insane or a psychopath by other characters. He himself has labeled his being as a "high functioning sociopath." In Big Bang Theory, Sheldon Cooper has been labeled as the "fan favorite" of the show because he is funny and brilliant, yet he lack social skills and does not know how to express emotion.

Television shows are not the only forms of modern story telling that shows characters whom are brilliant, yet damaged.

In Marvel's Thor and The Avengers, Loki, Thor's adopted brother, is a supervillan and hated by all of the heroes, except Thor, but is loved by so many fans of the comic books and films. Loki has a brilliant mind and shows it's brilliance throughout the two films, but he has issues with his heritage and did not take his father telling him he was adopted well. In fact, he tried to destroy his true race and then tried to destroy Midgard (Earth). Many people think Loki's character had been driven into madness from self-loathing and anger at his father. Even after all of this destruction, his character is still loved by so many. Another character admired in the Marvel Universe for their brains is Iron Man himself, Tony Stark. He calls himself a "genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist." He may be all these things, but he is also an alcoholic with commitment issues. These flaws are part of the reason fans admire the Man of Iron. Although he is a genius, he has flaws and he acknowledges these flaws, although he rarely does anything to help these flaws. Flaws are what makes people real people and not perfect robots.

The sad, insane, and mad although brilliant characters like Doctor House, The Master, The Doctor, Sherlock Holmes, Sheldon Cooper, Loki, Tony Stark, and so many others in popular television and films are loved by many because of their flaws and admired for their brilliance. Just like Doctor House, perhaps not all of them are truly bad, just simply misunderstood.

Andrea_3.4_DQ13

House is a great show! I believe that the whole contradiction of Dr. House's personality and his unbelievable skills, is what makes the show interesting for people. Besides, in the end he's not that bad of a person, he still saves lives...usually.

Andrea_3.3_DQ12

I believe it is reasonable to assume that our childhood experiences may affect later relationships, but not "determine" them. As it was said earlier in the book, personality is an ongoing process that may change as we experience different situations, I believe human beings are able to adapt to situations; of course, there are extreme cases in which the person's personality is too strong and resistant to change that it will not adapt to relationships. I don't believe all the experiences of one type of relationship should be the same, even with premise held by the attachment model. Even within the same type of relationship, you are dealing with different people; hence, you may have a different view on some people than the one you have of others.

Naima_3.4_DQ13

To be honest, I have heard of the show and I know lots of people love it; but I have NEVER watched a single episode of it. I guess that if Dr. House is a "bad" person or a grouchy person and people still like him,it may be due to the fact that he is very gifted, and that is a position that is attractive and admirable. I guess he is portrayed as the here character, so people know that they need him even though he is an insensitive person.

Naima_3.3_DQ12

I believe that it is reasonable to think that some of the things that we go through while we are kids have some sort of influence in later relationships. For instance, I know of people who experienced the separation of their parents while they were kids. This may create fear towards commitment, of just fear towards failing at a relationship. I think that not every relationship has to be the same though. I think we have the "power" to change the outcomes, as long as we change our way of thinking. When it comes to my romantic attachments,  I tend to gravitate toward a similar pattern. I do not plan that, but somehow it just happens, but the experiences have not been the same.

Corey_3.4_DQ13

This is one of my very favorite shows of all time, so I am very familiar with the show. People are fascinated with the show because of the irony in the character of House. He is one of the most emotionally detached, mean, and very snappy characters on television. With that being said, he saves lives and does it well. People watch episode after episode because of the irony that doctors normally care and are affected by life and death, and House simply puts off that he isn't. People watch in hopes that some day he will clear up the irony and show signs of care and compassion. This would prove his front and show his more 'human' side.

Annabel_3.4_DQ

Personally I have never seen the TV show House with Dr. Gregory. But, I know several TV shows that have painful people in them and people still watch the TV show. I think people watch shows that have bad characters because think we usually hope that justice will be served to the mean character. I think everyone who has seen a mean TV character wants something bad to happen to them or karma. I think everyone can relate to having a mean character in their life and wanting them to get what they deserve. And if there is an underdog with a mean character, people can relate it to themselves which makes it entertaining and keeps people watching.

Anne_3.3_DQ

When choosing our relationships, we sometimes base our relationships like the same relationship our parents have. We are prisoners of our past by the way our last relationships were like. If we know our mistakes and learn from them for the past relationship then it is a better and new beginning of your dating or relationship. Being attached to the same kind of relationships is wrong for you as a person only because it is what always getting you hurt for the next relationship you go to. My personal relationships that I have been in are always the same because I try to learn from my past relationships and see if there is anything out there that is different.

Anne_3.2_DQ

My earliest childhood memory would fall under the category of comfort. When I was little, I remember I hit my chin when I went under the table, and hit my chin on the corner. I did that about four times and would always get stiches. The reason why I would get comfort because I got hurt and my mom would comfort me to make me feel better because her first child got hurt and she wanted to make sure I was alright. I would not say that my first memory was the best, but it was my first memory.

Tyler_3.5_DQ#13

I think it is because a majority of the population nowadays is fascinated with drama and falure. Most people also enjoy saying "good thing I am not like that" and shows and movies with drama and falure give people the opportunity to say things like that.

Dalton_3.4_DQ13

When it comes to shows about people like House I believe that people watch to see amazing things that they could never do. People don't just want to see the interesting medical side of the show, but the intense drama that goes along with it. In most situations we can't act like he does. The drama that goes along with the show is entertaining and addicting.

Jwall_DQ_13

I think that Dr. House is one of those people put on so they don't have to interact with people, cause ultimately interaction with people ends up being one of two things 1) successful as hell or 2) a mass of completely awkward situations.  I think that House relies this and prefers to avoid those situations, but ultimately he wants that interaction like the rest of us, but hes just not willing to commit to the ups and downs of social interaction.

Jwall_DQ_12

I think that there is no doubt that early childhood experiences do indeed influence later actions. I would image that if you are treated badly as a child then you would naturally reflect that seeing as that is or was the only kind of treatment you received. I mean imagine you were blind and the only thing you had to interpret the world around you was noise, and someone controlled the kinds of sounds you herd, you'd think that the world was what you herd.

Gabriella_3.4_NI

I think it is incredible how we can change of mentality overtime. As we grow and evolve spiritually, mentally, and physically, we learn to distinguish clearly between good and bad in our own terms. Personality traits remain the same most of the time, but our preferences change as we take different journeys in life. While we are young, we want to date the most cool, outgoing, and popular person. Someone who has the best car, who goes to the best places, and with whom we can have lots of fun. As we grow, we get ready to get married to a reliable, supportive, and loyal person who will strive along to maintain a family in a peaceful and successful way. Undoubtedly, the personality traits that we look for change according to the stage in life we are in.

Melody_3.4_DQ13

Dr. Gregory House is definitely an interesting character. Like the book said, he is very arrogant, grouchy, inconsiderate, and insensitive. I think that Dr. House is incredibly lacking in social skills. He seems to not know, or he doesn't care, about what needs to be done to have healthy and successful relationships.

I honestly adore the character of Dr. Gregory House. I think that his sarcasm and remarks are hilarious; however, I wouldn't not want to actually know someone like that. I think that one of the reasons why people watch the show is because they are viewing the character of Dr. House from an outside perspective, not necessarily from the perspective of someone who actually has a relationship of any sort with someone like Dr. House; therefore, they are able to focus more on his humor and his gift as a physician. People may also think that his gift as a physician covers up for his lack in social skills; because he is able to help so many people in the medical field, he's "allowed" to behave as he pleases.

It's funny how people with specific talents that many admire can think that because they're gifted they can behave as they please; I think some of these people think that their gifts are enough to draw people to them, but if people build "relationships" with them just because of their talents, then none of those relationships are actually genuine. Like we discussed on other topics for our posts, relationships are build on similarities, or complements of personalities, and honesty between the two people. This requires these people with gifts and talents to also be considerate and sensitive to other people instead of boasting in their arrogance.

Fernando_3.4_NI

TV SHOWS

TV Shows are such an important part of social relationships nowadays, I would opine that it is because they are loaded with real information, real life experiences that almost everyone can relate with. They portray society with different lenses, giving the viewer a different experience about reality and his or her own life. 

I think watching TV shows, is a great way to see what people think about reality, it helps to understand different perpectives, and broadens our view about a specific matter. 

Alix_3.4_DQ13

Personally, I've only seen the TV show House a handful of times. So I am not going to have the best response to this question, but I will try. I think the reason why most people like Dr. House is because deep down, they can see how much the man truly cares about his patients. One of the few episodes I saw showed him tearing himself apart from the inside because a patient of his had passed away. He's witty and sarcastic and a lot of people enjoy that type of humor. House is a character that rarely shows emotion, but seems to always feel emotion.

DJ_3.4_DQ13

     People enjoy his one liners as well as the way he performs his relationships. Some are intrigued by the fact that people wish to continue working with Dr. House. It is also very interesting to see the way he practices medicine. I think some people  might find it humorous when he verbally abuses his coworkers and patients.

Dalton_3.3_DQ12

I think that relationships and events dictate who you are to become. That is not to say that everything you do makes you change as a person, but past relationships gone wrong can change you for the better or the worse. It's very easy to just give up when life gets hard, but sometimes it teaches you to become stronger.

Cole_DQ_3.4

People watch House for a variety of reasons. He could be considered an anti-hero, the concept of which has become increasingly popular in today's culture as people can more easily relate with anti-heroes than pure good heroes. He struggles with issues that many of us possess, but he is still able to maintain a logical and witty personality when he confronts his problems, leading to often amusing solutions that give people ideas for how to face their own. Finally, his character possesses a natural charisma that attracts fans. He has the natural likeability of an extrovert with the personality of an introvert which makes his interactions interesting to watch. The popularity of House makes me wonder if in today's culture, are fictitious characters more popular when they are introverts or extroverts? In my experience, I am finding more interesting introvert protagonists, but perhaps I am attracted to fiction of my own nature.

Gabriella_3.3_DQ

I do believe that early childhood experiences affect your later relationships because this is the time when you learn to overcome fears and develop self-confidence. If a child is repressed or abandoned during this stage, he or she might develop a sense of freedom without limitations or trust issues. Undoubtedly, these issues will affect later relationships whenever they get to a deeper point. However, there is a psychological technique called repression which I’ve used a couple of times, but not with early childhood experiences. Actually it was like 3 years ago, something hurtful happened, and I decided to shut down my feelings and repress them. Certainly, we are not prisoners of our past, but it does not mean that we are going to forget a bad event overnight. I believe a successful life depends a lot in a good attitude. The way in which we face situations in life determine what kind of person you are. My two last romantic attachments were very similar, and even though the persons had similar personalities, they did have differences especially in the way they treated me. One was more affectionate than the other, and this difference is explained by their early childhood experiences. One is not good at expressing his feelings and comes from a family with a whole lot of issues. The other is very caring and loving and he comes from a united family who always treated him with love, since he was a toddler.

Fernando_3.3_NI

Experiences in infancy.

I acknowledge that experiences are influential for life decisions, and they affect so much the way we see life. But I also think that regardless of what we may have gone through, our beliefs are what really guide our judgment. For example, in my own life, I see that despite my past experiences, like when I was a kid one of my best friends lied to me, I still believe that not every friend I have will lie to me, so I trust them because my beliefs tell me to. I do think that experiences have a large impact on who we are now, and what we perceive as right, wrong, adequate, etc. But it will never be the only factor that affects us as a whole.

Alix_3.2_DQ12

This question dives into several different branches of the same relating idea. I do think certain experiences we have in our early stages of developing are carried with us throughout our entire lives, but that does not mean they have to affect us negatively. We change choose to develop ourselves and relate to others however we want and only we have the power to do that. Instead, others, at times, can tend to let their past experiences shape their future, which is absurd to me. Personally, I tend to find relationships, and we're talking as in I find a girl like, who has... well, just isn't perfect. They tend to have something under their skin from their past that is broken. Whether it be a past lover that still irks them, or their parents abusing them. I find myself wanting to fall in love with a broken soul that I can mend. I am a helper in that way. So in that case I guess you can say that my romantic attachments have been the same, but besides that my relationships have varied significantly from age, ethnicity, and class (lower-upper).

Cole_3.3_DQ

Every experience in life plays a part in ultimately molding people. The word "prisoner" is a good word to describe the correlation between our past and present selves. The past cannot be changed, but we are not bound by it. Still, the fact that it is unchangeable presents a feeling of inevitability, so we are chained in a sense. Whether that is a good thing or not depends on each person’s particular past. Regardless, no one has the same past, so no one experiences the same relationship. My relationships have all been different and it could be argued that this is because my past relationships have showed me what does and does not work well.

Corey_3.3_DQ12

I think that no matter if the experience is positive or negative or even what stage of life an experience comes to us in, it has an effect on our later relationships. The smallest events can have the biggest impacts, and I can state this through experience. Things I thought were too insignificant to affect me I think of today. That is in my conscious, mature state. I can only imagine how experiences affected me when I was too young to know how to interpret and filter experiences! We aren't prisoners of what has happened to us, however. No matter the situation, I believe that we have every ability to heal or change from our pasts. What's passed is in the past and has no weight on today.

In my own life, every relationship I've had has been different. No two have I treated, handled, or approached the same. Each has had its own set of challenges and triumphs. In this, that proves the attachment theory may not apply to me.

Melody_3.3_DQ12

I definitely think that experiences in infancy affect later relationships. I have seen and heard of many cases in which people experience something during their childhood that left a huge emotional impact on them, and unless they have actively dealt with those things, those experiences still affect their relationships right now. I think this is because when something emotionally damaging happens, and by this I'm referring more to familial things since familial relationships are the most important relationships in one's childhood, one's self-worth or trust in other people or emotional well-being in general is usually negatively affected. I believe that these experiences in childhood affect future relationships because even though people grow up and are able to rationalize and understand most of the things that they went through during their childhood, the emotional wounds that they had when they were children stay with them unless they are sorted through and dealt with. With that being said, I do not at all believe that we are prisoners of our past. I fully believe that changes can be made and wounds can be healed.

I think people, especially in the culture that we live in, tend to underestimate the impact that familial issues leave on individuals, especially when the individuals are young. Even the smallest thing like a parent saying something offensive to his or her child can really affect the self-worth of the child which then affects the emotional well-being of the child even into adulthood.

DJ_3.3_DQ12

     I think that experiences in infancy can affect many things, however at this time I believe it is to some extent unreasonable to make such assumptions. Though through experiments studies and gain knowledge of the future I may be proven wrong, this is a topic that I myself am not 100% certain enough about to answer.

     I believe we should not turn away from our past, but I don't exactly think prisoners of it either. We all have the ability to alter the way we act over time, at the same time however if we ignore our past altogether in the mistakes we've made will haunt us to an even greater extreme. For instance if NASA had not modified their rocket design following the first failed experiment and we would never reach the moon. I see people changing their lives every day whether it be the way that they talk or even just the way they walk no matter what their history is. I guess another way to think of it is if you put your hand on a fire you get burned and pull your hand away, following that experience you never wanted do that again without thinking first.  It is in this way I believe we all "evolve", or adapt to our surroundings and the relationships in which we take part in.

     The reason why I believe that the experiences can not be the same even if the relationship is the same kind. Is simply that it can't be the same relationship because the other person is different in some way shape or form.  And it is this difference that causes the experience to be altered in comparison to previous relationships. However I still don't understand what exactly is attachment theory is and without understanding that I cannot give an honest answer as to the possibilities if this theory is correct or incorrect.

Tyler_3.3_DQ#12

     My experiences in infancy have definatly had a great afftect on what I do in my relationships now. Personally I have been able to reject the problems of my past and turn over a new leave several times in my life. My relationships are never the same because I bring the things I have learned and experienced from the previous relationships and used the problems to unprove the way I handle my current relationships. My romatic partners have all been different in thier own ways. Hallelujah, Amen!

alex _3.3_DQ12

Everyone changes somehow after a relationship. mainly because of experience and maturing. Many  people mature and grow up a little bit after being in more then one relationship. As you get older you learn more about how people are and how you should treat people.  

Madeleine_3_DQ12

"Study the past if you would define the future."

- Confucius

 

 

I think that the past affects all relationships in the future. Your infancy and childhood is when you begin developing, but not when you finish. You may have something happen to you that is traumatic and it will affect you in the future, but while you are still developing, it is easier to, in theory, re-wire your brain in order to overcome such trauma then when you are older. All people react differently to different experiences. 

Mary_3.2_DQ11

The question asked us if we think most people's memories would be connected to acceptance and comfort or rejection and insecurities. I believe that while most of us in this class would say acceptance and comfort we must also factor in other things. For example, take people who are adopted. While many feel accepted I have personally known some who think that because their parents have them up they have been rejected. Also if a person has been abused, even if it's only emotional, they will not feel that way.

Andrea_2.3_DQ11

If we start recollecting from our first moments as human beings then it is possible to say that such memories can be associated with acceptance, rejection, comfort and insecurity. Think about it, starting from the moment we were born, we cry because we have been introduced into this new place that looks and feels like nothing that we had seen before. It is a completely new experience for us which takes us out of our comfort zone; thus, we cry in response to this feeling of insecurity. Then, as we grow old, we learn to develop relationships with the people around us, we seek acceptance from them, even from our own parents or any immediate family we have. Hazan & Shaver argue that "early learned behaviors transfer to later life and to relationships with other people even as adults" (as cited in Duck, 2011, p.65).  This may refer to sometimes when we are in the search for acceptance, we may face situations of rejection, and the way we deal with rejection may shape our personality as well.  

DJ_3.2_NQ

     I still don't understand what he means by "personality as a ghost in the machine", can someone help explain it to me?

Fernando_3.2_NI

Earliest Memories.

I believe that many of these memories, the ones that are made throughout our first decade of life, are the ones that most impact our development and growth. This is not only in our personality, but also in the way we see ourselves and see others, the way we relate to them, and the way we express our thoughts, ideas, and opinions about anything.
In my case, I have very bright, happy, and nice memories of my childhood, in most of them I am smiling, laughing, or people around me are happy. These memories bring me thoughts of support, of encouragement, and positivity, and I believe this is one of the biggest reasons why I am so outgoing, expressive, and talkative.

Annabel_3.2_DQ

I think most memories for people’s early years as a child would be more acceptance and comfort than rejection and insecurity. I say this because in most early years as a child you don’t really think about insecurities because there is less to worry about when you don’t have responsibilities, and do not have the pressure of society and other people. When you are young most people are going to be nice to you and not reject or be mean like if you were older. I understand that not everyone’s childhood is great or easy, but when you are younger you tend to have more happy times than sad times.

Christian_3.2_DQ11

Collect people's earliest memories. How many of them would you say are connected to themes of acceptance, rejection, comfort, and insecurity?

I have a pretty good memory. I can look back and remember things that happened around me when I was two years old and attended day care. Now that I think about it, I rarely forget anything, unless it is not important, or I choose to forget about it; my memories are pretty clear. I have always been able to remember things and little details that other people would not remember, even if they were there too. I have memories that connect to acceptance, rejection, comfort, and insecurity, and after thinking about it, all the pieces fall together as to why I am the way I am today. People's memories shape the way they see life today, and even if they can't remember it clearly, there is a memory somewhere in the back of their head that shaped the attittude they hold towards something today.

Corey_3.2_DQ11

Of all the earliest memories, I would say that most are tied to acceptance, rejection, comfort, or insecurity in some way. The reason for this is because these instances are significant events in a child's life. Are you more likely to remember a significant event from a month ago or the lunch you had 1 week and 3 days ago?

I think that most of our memories that we retain with vivid detail are related to the themes named above. Our mind is more likely to remember things that please or displease it in a great way. For this reason, I think that's why the first memories we have are more often than not tied to those themes.

Gabriella_3.2_NQ

I agree when the book says that perspective that physical structures and social orders of attractiveness change from culture to culture and from person to person. In Honduras, we say that there is a color for every preference. This old saying means that there is a diversity of tastes and preferences among people, so what I might like maybe my best friend will hate. However, even though we have very similar personalities, there are certain things that we do not share. Sometimes I ask myself how could she date that person but it is just a matter of taste. Furthermore, a cultural example happens between Hispanic and American people. I believe Hispanics find white skin and light-colored eyes attractive because of the stereotype, and I have heard many comments from American people who find dark hair and tanned skin attractive instead. Since humans are most likely going to spend time with somebody who thinks in a similar way, my question is if beyond feeling attracted to each other, are two people from different countries likely to fall in love with each other despite the cultural differences?

Becca_3.2_DQ11

One of my best memories from my childhood is something that is kind of weird. It was a terrifying experience for me at the moment, but now it helps me to see what kind of parents and models I had in my life. I lost my favorite stuffed animal when I was little and my parents went through so many things to make sure that I was happy again. Not only did they buy another one just like it, but they went dumpster diving until they found it. Now I have Horsie 1 and 2 that sit on my shelf at home!

It is one of those things that I'll be able to look back at and tell my kids about unconditional love.

Dalton_3.2_DQ11

The earliest memories of childhood for some people are treasured things that they keep close and share with a few close friends. For others early memories are recollections of the past that they wish they could forget. The few people I've spoken to about their early memories have given me stories of warmth and security. On rare occasions I hear about the insecurity and fear that goes along with living in a bad neighborhood or fighting parents. The story changes from person to person, but the feelings remain basically the same.

Alix_3.2_NQ

The book asks us what kind of memories we have of our early childhood, and I would generally say that we tend to think of something comforting from our home, or family. Maybe it's even happiness. But what I want to know, is if you had the chance to either delete a memory from your mid, or change the outcome of a memory, would you? Or has that experience somehow shaped who you are today? We're talking about changing our past here people. Do you think your life would be the same today? I'd love to know.

alex_3.2_DQ11

One of the best memories i had as a kid was the first time i played baseball. the rec team i played for was not very good but i was one of the better players on the team. It was the final inning in the game and my team was down by one there were two men on second and third with two outs and i hit a walk off base hit to win the game. After that moment I always wanted to play in the big leagues. I was always trying to get better and better every day. Baseball was the first sport that i ever got into. It is also what gave me the competitive drive i have today.

Madeleine_3_DQ11

When I think of my earliest memories, I think of when I was at my grandparents house and spending time with my Papa. I also think of when I would play with figurines of animals, people, etc. with my little sister for hours. I think early memories are of moments, small or large, that meant something special to the person that affects how they are now.

Cole_3.2_DQ

The earliest memory I possess is when I was a baby, crawling around on the floor when it was night time. Found a flash light and got freaked out by the light on the ceiling because I thought it was a giant skull. Plus, Winnie the Pooh in the dark was pretty terrifying. My parents opened the door and put me back in my crib, but I crawled out and started crying again. They thought I was just being a baby and left me alone. I related the experience later, and they were shocked to know that I remembered in such detail this particular experience. Infants are much more intelligent than people give them credit for. I would not really say that the experience has anything to do with comfort or insecurity; it was just a multitude of fears that seemed rational through infant eyes. Even though I personally can't see it, do you think an experience like this would have a psychological impact on who I became over time?

Naima_2.3_DQ11

I asked one of my friends what was his earliest memories as a kid, and he said that his earliest memory was opening christmas presents and getting a "real" train. I think this would be a memory that brings comfort and happinnes and that is why he is able to recall it. I asked another friend and she remembers that when she was four years old she used to take ballet lessons, and her brother would play music and have her dance for many hours, even though she wanted to stop.

My first memory, however, is not very happy. I was at my aunt's house and I asked her to make fried plantains for me because I was hungry. By this time I was 2 years old. I ate my plantains and then went back to the kitchen because I was still hungry and pulled the pan in which my aunt had fried the food. The pan had hot oil still in it, and it fell all over my tummy. They had to take me to the doctor. I don't remember all of this happening, but I do remember when I was at the doctor's and he had to rip off my shirt in order to clean the wound, I remember being taken home after that. I think that this event may have caused some sort of stress and that is why I can recall it.

Melody_3.2_NI

Steve Duck quotes Gordon Allport in his book, saying "personality is less a finished product than a transitory process. While it has some stable features, it is at the same time continually undergoing change." I think this answers the question of whether or not personalities change or remain the same throughout one's life. I understand that just because a psychologist says something, it doesn't necessarily mean that it is true, but I definitely agree with Allport. I think personalities are constantly evolving according to the experiences of the individual. Experiences shape the way we think and behave, therefore altering our personalities. Duck gives his opinion on personalities and asserts that he thinks personality should be seen as an expression on what one knows, which I understand as one's experiences. Experience includes a wide variety of things in my opinion; this includes relationships with parents and family as a child, friendships with friends in adolescence, romantic partners, work experiences, and many others. This are just a few examples, but these are things that influence the decisions that we make, the things that we do and say, the way we think, and many more aspects of our lives. Experience, I believe, shapes one's personality more than anything else.